Rantings of a sub-editor

May 18, 2012

Let me try and explain this

Filed under: try and/try to,word choice — substuff @ 9:57 am
Tags: ,

Earlier this week, I posed a question on Twitter.

I love Twitter, and being connected with a community of editing professionals bigger than I could ever hope to meet in real life is a real honour. But it can be frustrating at times, basically because we’re all such pedantic bastards. I’d hoped to discuss whether ‘try and’ was a regional expression, and whether it was used for a slightly different meaning than ‘try to’. But even though I’d acknowledged in the initial question that the ‘to’ form was the correct one, the conversation got stuck on that point.

‘Try and’ is wrong, I was told. Wrong, wrong, wrong: simple. You can see the conversation, and my growing exasperation, here.

Except that language isn’t simple. You can have formal, standard or style-guide compliant styles, and you can have colloquial, slang or pidgin variations, but language is rarely wrong. Unless you’re misunderstood by almost everyone, almost all of the time. Then, perhaps, you’re doing it wrong.

Also, to tell someone that the way they speak is ‘wrong’ can be a little, erm, insensitive. Though we mostly conform to similar rules when writing, our spoken language differs wildly and reflects our culture, background, family, geography and education. To use myself as an example, here are just three things that I observe in formal writing but not in speech: fewer and less; who and whom; try to and try and.

Perhaps if I were meeting the queen, I’d make an exception. But the rest of the time: no, because how I speak is a reflection of who I am, where I’m from and how, and by whom, I was brought up. I’m sure this is the same for most people – speech and identity are tightly tied, and if you criticise one you criticise the other.

My mother (from sarf London) has a painful memory of meeting my father’s parents (from deepest Kent) and having her pronunciation of ‘bowl’ (‘bawl’) corrected (‘bewl’). Someone once suggested I might improve my career prospects if I observed ‘whom’ in speech. This is scummy, classist bollocks, I’m afraid, and I send a big WRONG to anyone who indulges in it. Whether you’re an editor, a sub-editor, a teacher, a lecturer or a fricking rocket scientist, remember: unless invited, you never have the right to criticise someone’s style of speaking.

‘Try to’ and ‘try and’

Anyway, back to ‘try to’ and ‘try and’. I’m going to have another bash here, and please feel free to join in below if you’re interested.

Firstly, let’s be so, so, SO clear that no-one can misinterpret. If it’s grammatically correct and formal you’re after, ‘try to’ is the one for you. But ‘try and’ has a lot going for it. It’s easier to say (at least in my southern drawl), and has a friendlier sound. And if there’s no problem with “go and get ready” or “come and see me”, why the objection to ‘try and’?

Secondly, although the two are broadly used to mean the same thing, there is sometimes a subtle difference. For example, “I’ll try and read that later” suggests that I may not get around to reading it, but that if I do, I’m pretty confident I’ll be able to. “I’ll try to read that later” could mean that I’ll struggle with the actual reading. In the Facebook screenshot below, the points by Pablo and Terry, in particular, match my own interpretation. And while Terry’s a southerner, Pablo’s an exotic Leeds breed. So I guess it’s not just a Bognor-and-surrounds thing. 

It’s not, as some people argue, ambiguous. “I’ll try and read that later” is just as clear as “I’ll try to read that later”. On Twitter, I was told that the ‘and’ suggested a second action must also be taking place, which made the expression misleading. But you’d have to wilfully misread it to get confused. Or would you? If you would genuinely be confused by “I’ll try and read that later”, please do leave a comment and explain why. In the Facebook screenshot, Michael gives the example “I hope to obtain a copy. I’ll try and read it later.” – but, for me at least, in the absence of a pause/comma after the ‘try’, I would hear/read it as the equivalent of ‘try to’.

Even if the expression itself can be ambiguous (and I am doubtful of that), that’s no reason to brand it as ‘wrong’. Pretty much all words and combinations thereof can be open to misinterpretation if used unthinkingly. A large part of being a good communicator, in speech or writing, is using your judgement to limit that risk.

Rant nearly over now, I promise. But here’s a kick-arse link, courtesy of Stan Carey, to the Merriam Webster dictionary. Its entry on ‘try and’ quotes Roy Copperud on attempts to separate it from ‘try to’: “This proves nothing but the lengths to which the wrongheaded will go to make nonexistent points.” Ahh.

Any thoughts?

April 20, 2012

Hang on, was it S&M or M&S?

Filed under: word choice — substuff @ 7:28 pm

 

Firstly, Mum, don’t read this one. I’m going to talk about rude things.

[anyone who knows my mum knows there's no way she's heeding that, but it helps my conscience]

It all got a bit too much for the Metro today, with the Kirsty Sowden court case. So exciting to be able to put false rape allegations and sadomasochism in one story, oo oo oo! The thing is, though, if a woman is wearing dog lead and being spanked, she’s not a “acting as a dominatrix”. Here’s a link to the same story in the Telegraph, which got it right.

It’s easy to get so sweaty palmed about these things that you make mistakes, but as this example shows, get it wrong and you’re suddenly making wild statements that simply aren’t true. Just because something is *weird*, doesn’t mean it fits into one simple box labelled “weird”, or, in this case, “dominatrix”.

There are lots of shades of weird in the world, and while they may overlap, they’re not all interchangeable. For example, the word sadomasochist is often used when the correct word would be sadist. There’s also a lot of confusion between bondage, domination and S&M, which aren’t necessarily the same thing at all. I’m not asking you to go away and mucky up your browser history, honest. But if you’re going to label someone with a particular name, at least make sure it’s accurate.

Here’s a little glossary, mostly thanks to Collins:

dominatrix a woman who is the dominant sexual partner in a sadomasochistic or power-exchange relationship
submissive the one who submits (definition of submit here)
sadist a person who gains pleasure or sexual gratification from the infliction of pain and mental suffering on another person
masochist a person who takes pleasure, often sexual, from their own suffering
sadomasochist a person with both sadistic and masochistic elements, characterized by both aggressive and submissive periods in relationships with others
bondage a sexual practice in which one partner is physically bound
bdsm the whole kit and caboodle; it stands for bondage, domination, discipline, submission, sadism and masochism. Yes, that’s too many words, but definitions vary and there’s probably already a red light flashing in the IT department as I type this, so suffice to say, if what you’re looking for is a term that sums up ”all that crazy stuff”, bdsm is the puppy.

There now, this post should bump up the number of strange search terms that bring people to my blog. More disappointed punters – sorry folks!

January 10, 2012

Public-sourced photos? Cum off it!

Filed under: word choice — substuff @ 6:39 pm
*snigger*

Incidentally, the name of my local Jamaican takeaway is...

This is a post of two parts, and, like some kind of popular Swedish novel, it won’t make much sense until they collide.

Firstly, have you noticed that Collins has made it free to search its online dictionary? Brilliant news. So, if, like me, you have a mind to, you can now compare word definitions from Oxford and Collins side by side. Perfect. Collins definitely has the edge in terms of nice, clean, ad-free design, as well as some lovely features such as usage graphs.

Anyway, I was raving about this yesterday, when someone pointed out a potential flaw on the Collins site. In an unbelievably trusting move, they’ve linked it up to Flickr. Yes, that’s right. Whatever word you search for, on the results page you’ll also get public-sourced images tagged with that word. WHAT?

As I’m incredibly mature and above such things, I immediately tried “breast”. Wow, boobies!  Next, with chickens clearly in mind, I tried “cock”. Obviously. Try it, go on – down on the right-hand side of the results page. It shows just two images from a pool of photos with the relevant tags, so I don’t promise you rudeness every time. But there’s a strong chance of it.

Okay, enough of the Vangers. Over to the second part: the goth girl (she’s not really a goth, but bear with me).

Also yesterday, I had a read of Claire Maxwell’s blog, specifically her post on Sophie Dahl’s book. She’s very good, is Claire, by the way, and what I’m about to say is in no way a criticism – have a read for yourself, and then marvel that she writes like that at the tender age of just 18.

Anyway, Claire had written in her blog post: “It’s a cookery book-come-autobiography.” And this should be cum, rather than come.

cum: preposition used between two nouns to designate an object of a combined nature

Now I thought to drop her a quick message (and in fact I did, and she replied that she’d had a feeling it should be cum but couldn’t bring herself to write it – “my grandad reads it!”). But before I wrote the message, I got to thinking: if she doesn’t believe me, where should she look it up? I don’t want to incite a young lady to type cum into Google, for goodness’ sake.

And so, the Vangers and the goth girl collide. Of course, the new Collins page was the perfect place. I could send a link to the definition, thus sidestepping any potential need for Googling. But I can confirm that those of clean mind and only reasonable levels of curiosity should not scroll down.

On the bright side, I have learnt about some delightful features you can give characters on Second Life (and, luckily for everyone else, that photo is no longer being displayed).

Call it a hunch, but I don’t think this particular feature is a keeper. The overall service, however, gets a big thumbs up from me.

December 21, 2011

As to ‘as to’

Filed under: word choice — substuff @ 9:23 pm

I like to think I’m pretty well acquainted with language irritations (yes, I’m refusing to use the word ‘bugbear’). But yesterday, two people picked me up on one I’d never considered: as to.

I’d written a guide to using ellipses and asked for feedback from my colleagues. Both questioned the as to in the following sentence.

In the following three cases, first consider whether you really need an ellipsis. Often, when the omission is at the start or end of a sentence, you can simply quote the remaining part without causing any confusion as to the meaning. However, sometimes an ellipsis is necessary for clarity.

It had never occurred to me, so I thought I’d ask Twitter. It turns out that objection is pretty widespread: as to was variously described as ‘faux formalism’, ‘pompous’ and ‘horrid’ – the kind of language that would be ‘written by a man in a bow tie’ and would ‘make one sound like a copper’. Well. That’s me told.

So, while I make no promises as to swearing off as to altogether, I’ll certainly be thinking before I write it again.

Here’s the Twitter conversation, if you’re interested. I’d also be curious to hear what others make of @catordog2′s claim that my use of any could change the meaning of the sentence. I’ll own up to it being superfluous (though I have chosen to retain it as I think it makes for a gentler tone, which is what I am going for here), but don’t see how it can change the meaning.

And, in case you’re wondering, I changed my as to to over.

Edit: in a classic case of oh-dear-it’s-already-been-written-and-better, I’d like to recommend Stan Carey’s post on as to. It’s far more sensible and comprehensive. :-)

December 5, 2011

Why ‘post’, not ‘after’?

Filed under: word choice — substuff @ 6:36 pm
Tags: ,

Dear businessperson,

You upset me when you write post but mean after. You lead me up the garden path with your tricksy words. See, I think you’re about to start talking about letters, mail and the Post Office. But you’re not. You just think after is a bit too dull, straightforward and English, and you fancy jazzing things up with a bit of Latin. But it’s really bloody unhelpful, actually.

Take this sentence (names have been changed to protect vulnerable parties): “What prospects are there for us post the proposals to tackle banana fraud?”

My eye doesn’t usually read a sentence in slow sequence – unless I’m deliberately reading slowly, I see the key words more or less at the same time. Consequently, when I look at this I’m expecting something about posting proposals. But is that what you mean? No. So I have to go back and read it slowly, and I don’t thank you for that, because I’m very busy and extremely important.

Now, what I really wanted to write here was that even in Latin, yes, even if we transported ourselves back to ancient Rome, you wouldn’t be able to use post like that because it’s a prefix. Postproposal, perhaps, but not post the proposals. However, having checked with a couple of people who actually know their Latin from their elbow (thank you @Nickety and @helendorritt) before making these wild assertions, I’ve discovered that I’m wrong. But, seeing as I’m wrong, I’ve decided that that’s not really the point.

The point is that when you wrote post, you meant after. So why not just say so? We don’t speak Latin, as I think I’ve just demonstrated (ahem). Also, although you meant after, I think that in this case considering would have been a better choice of word – if they’re proposals then the main concern is likely to be the concept rather than the chronological positioning. No?

In short, I’d just really like you to say what you mean. And if you do want to use post, other than in an existing word such as postmortem, posthumous, etc, save it for adjectival uses where after doesn’t quite suffice. Post-rant cup of tea, anyone?

Many thanks,

A. Reader

PS I am also fed up of reading about perfect storms. Please stop.

August 3, 2011

Bomb drama

Filed under: drama — substuff @ 1:45 pm
Tags: ,

The word ‘drama’ jumped out at me as inappropriate in this headline from The Times. There’s a free-to-view story here on the Guardian, too.

Does anyone else object, or am I being oversensitive?

From Collins:
1) a work to be performed by actors
2) the genre of literature represented by works intended for the stage
3) the art of writing and production of plays
4) a situation or sequence of events that is highly emotional, tragic, or turbulent.

Definition 4) seems to fit quite well, so perhaps I am indeed being oversensitive. I just feel that the meaning has been made slightly flippant by phrases such as ’drama queen’.

And of course, that Black Eyed Peas classic My Humps.

(They say I’m really sexy,
The boys they wanna sex me.
They always standing next to me,
Always dancing next to me,
Tryin’ a feel my hump, hump.
Lookin’ at my lump, lump.
You can look but you can’t touch it,
If you touch it I’m a start some drama,
You don’t want no drama,
No, no drama, no, no, no, no drama
So don’t pull on my hand boy,
You ain’t my man, boy,
I’m just tryn’a dance boy,
And move my hump.)

Anyone got an opinion?

March 14, 2011

When is a crisis not a catastrophe?

Filed under: crisis/catastrophe — substuff @ 11:30 am
Tags: , ,

Early this bleary morning, I was half-listening to Radio 4. The newsreader was talking about the second explosion at the Fukushima nuclear plant. I’m not quoting here, but he said something along the lines of “however, the crisis [at the plant] is not expected to become a catastrophe”.

My ears pricked up at this – I’d kind of assumed a crisis and a catastrophe were one and the same. But as I was simultaneously pulling on my boots, mainlining a cup of tea and brushing my teeth in a triumph of elegant multitasking, I didn’t have a spare hand to reach for the dictionary.

I’ve just looked them up now, and there’s definitely a difference.

From the OED:

Crisis:

  1. a a decisive moment. b a time of danger or great difficulty.
  2. the turning point, esp of a disease.

Catastrophe

  1. a great and unusually sudden disaster.
  2. the denoument of a drama.
  3. a disastrous end; ruin.
  4. an event producing a subversion of the order of things.

 So a crisis, rather than being a disaster, is the point when something becomes (or doesn’t become) the kind of disaster that ends life as we know it.

Go Radio 4.

I wish I’d found out in happier circumstances, though. Ganbatte, Nihon, ganbatte.

January 4, 2011

Who reaped what, eh?

Filed under: reap,word choice — substuff @ 4:14 pm
Tags:

The mark of a truly bad headline is not that you burst into laughter or shake your head in disgust, but that you are left scratching your head in incomprehension. That’s where I was left by this particular piece of Which?ery.

Excess costs reap benefits for insurers

At times like this, a Japanese expression unearths itself in my brain. “Imi wa?” (literally “the meaning is?”) And this headline, on one of our own press releases, had me wondering what the imi wa for quite some time. It’s all back to front, innit.

It is, literally (yes, I say, literally) awful.

1. This is a horrible abuse of the word “reap”. People can reap, but costs cannot. And you can’t reap by proxy – ie, if costs could reap, they would be doing it for themselves, not for insurers. Insurers can, however, reap the benefits of excess costs. Yes.

2. Even if you can get beyond reap, there’s a string of three verbs or potential verbs in the middle (costs, reap, benefits). And if words that can be read as both nouns and verbs don’t confuse a reader, I don’t know what does. Put three together and you’re damned.

From the OED:

Reap
Receive as the consequence of one’s own or others’ actions.

So you reap what you sow. And you can also reap what others sow. But the sowing does not reap for you, oh no.

December 9, 2010

Hacks hit by plea to say it like it is

Filed under: hit by,word choice — substuff @ 4:57 pm
Tags: ,

pylon hit by car

Any sub-editor worth their salt will have had this rant at some point, so I doubt I will pick up any points for originality here. But I’m going to rant anyway (well heck, it’s the name of the blog, after all).

Say what you mean. That’s it. Not much of a rant, I admit (it’s coming, it’s coming). There is great value in saying exactly what you mean. (In life, too, she muses.) That means not fancying it up with convoluted metaphors in the hope that you’ll sound more intelligent, not lazily lobbing in any old verb, and never repeating something that you yourself don’t understand. Teachers of journalism often tell you to speak as if you’re telling a friend at the pub. It’s good advice. But do it as if you’re on your first pint of the evening, not your last.

Here’s one that’s been upsetting me: “hit by”. One day last week, at a horrible pre-dawn hour, I picked up a copy of the Metro. “Hit by” was in the headline on the front cover, then the headline, standfirst and copy on page three. But what does it actually mean? Well… pretty much anything negative: “affected by”, “delayed by”, “crashed into by (ew)”, “damaged by”, etc. I’m being a little hypocritical here, as I’m sure I’ve used it myself in many a headline – after all, it’s so pleasingly short and easy to fit in. But I shouldn’t, if I can possibly avoid it, and neither should you. And while it may occasionally be excusable in headlines, there’s rarely a good reason for using it in copy.

Here’s a quick look at today’s hit-by headlines:

Financial Times: HMV hit by sharp decline in sales What does the “hit by” add here that couldn’t be communicated with “HMV sales decline sharply”? (Or, personal favourite, “plummet”.)

Sky News: Petrol bomber hit by own firebomb YES! This is the right way to use it! (The expression, not the firebomb.)

Heatworld: Coronation Street Live hit by terrorist fears Not really… they’ve just hired some extra security.

Marie Claire: Christina Aguilera hit by nude photo scandal (Hmm, I wonder which of these links you’ll all be clicking on.)

Belfast Telegraph: SMEs hit hardest by drop in exports What does this even mean? Ah, never mind - as a reader, I’ve already turned the page.

None of these, however, match up to the daftness of this standfirst in the Metro last week. “More than half of all rail operators will be hit by engineering work over the festive period.” But they won’t, will they? It was the rail operators, after all, that arranged the engineering work. If anyone will be “hit by” anything, it’ll be the commuters (in the ballroom with the resulting delays).

I have three main complaints about “hit by”:

  1. It’s lazy. Think of a word that actually means something, and use that instead.
  2. It’s passive, which makes for dull copy. Go active! “Engineering works will cause xxx xxx xxx over the festive period” [xxxs indicates where the news (yes, news!) should go, not kisses].
  3. It has a plausible literal meaning. Your reader sees the words “rail”, “hit”, and ”by” and expects to read about a train crash. Don’t mess with their minds.

In other please-write-what-you-mean news, here’s an example from a car review that I edited yesterday: “The car is fairly pedestrian-friendly as there aren’t any hard surfaces directly beneath the bonnet.”

Personally, I’m not a big fan of the -friendly construction at the best of times. If it’s user-friendly, is it going to hug me? Friendliness should be reserved for sentient beings, in my humble opinion. But it’s hard to escape on a consumer magazine, and I don’t usually make a fuss. But “pedestrian-friendly”? You must be kidding! Crashing into pedestrians is not a friendly thing to do, however few hard surfaces you have under your bonnet.

I said as much on Twitter, and received the following reply from @AndrewNoakes “Know what you mean, but how else do you say it in a few words? ‘Less pedestrian unfriendly’ is more accurate, but clumsy.”

Well, how about: “There are no hard surfaces directly below the bonnet, minimising danger to pedestrians in the event of a crash.” It ain’t beautiful, but it does say what it means. If anyone can sum it up with both beauty and sense (possibly in haiku format, for extra kudos), I’d be interested to hear it.

Incidentally, considering my comment on sentience (although, strictly speaking, I suppose having skin does not necessarily imply it – discuss), the same report also contained the sentence: “It has an interior that can be a little daunting to get used to, such is the number of gadgets the car has under its skin.” Yeuch.

Finally, and as if to prove my point about this rant being far from original, the Guardian’s excellent Mind Your Language blog today featured a post on early style manuals, specifically A Plea for the Queen’s English, written by Henry Alford, dean of Canterbury, in 1863. It includes the following sage advice:

Call a spade a spade, not a well-known oblong instrument of manual industry; let a home be a home, not a residence … The only way to shine, even in this false world, is to be modest and unassuming. Elegance of language may not be in the power of all of us; but simplicity and straightforwardness are.

Damn straight.

November 23, 2010

Vanilla routers

Filed under: vanilla,word choice — substuff @ 11:58 am
Tags: ,

I was subbing some wireless router reviews last week – 17 pages of them, to be precise (I shall let you draw your own conclusions as to how exciting that was) – when I came across one described as “the vanilla 2.4Ghz option”.

Now this took me somewhat by surprise. Relax, relax, I didn’t think it was vanilla-scented or anything like that.  It was just that although I’ve heard “vanilla” used to describe conventional sex (see the Wikipedia explanation here, if you’re a sweet innocent), or softcore porn, I’ve never heard it used to describe… routers. Or much else, for that matter.

However, when I enquired about this on Twitter, a fair few people suggested that I was not quite - how to put it - with the times. Apparently it’s been in common usage for a good 20 years. Well, fine.

The Urban Dictionary has some good contributions to make, as ever.

  • Unexciting, normal, conventional, boring.
  • Straight down the line, boring sex, with as little foreplay as possible, the kind of sex that the Catholic Church (proud sponsors of this year’s Republican party) want you to have, if you have to have sex at all, and if you’re married.
  • Preferring an activity or thing in its basic and unmodified state. Refers to vanilla ice cream. Used when expressing a preference for having something the traditional way.
  • Original game format without any mods.

And Whatis?.com offers this definition, which is particularly relevant to the case in point.

In information technology, vanilla (pronounced vah-NIHL-uh) is an adjective meaning plain or basic. The unfeatured version of a product is sometimes referred to as the vanilla version.

So, okay. I’ll admit to being behind the times on this one. In further evidence, here’s the Guardian, proving that vanilla goes with anything from vampires to economic growth plans (thank you to Trenchard for these, from afar).

On vampires:
We have evil vampires and benevolent vampires, traditional vampires and postmodern vampires, camp vampires and vanilla vampires, virginal vampires and cocksure, sexually explosive vampires. A veritable gush of vampires, an unstoppable arterial spray of the bastards. We’re so saturated by this cultural exsanguination, I half-expected Tony Blair’s memoirs to come with a vampire angle (or did they? he asked mischievously).

On special-edition DVDs:
People who buy DVDs and Blu-rays tend to fall into two camps. Some just want to own the film or TV series. They don’t care if they’re buying a collector’s item, a double gold-plated bumper anniversary special edition or a no-frills vanilla disc.

On Katy Perry’s Teenage Dream:
As an experiment in west coast genetic engineering, in which Brian Wilson’s vanilla fantasies synch up with Snoop Dogg’s tongue-in-cheek gangsta shtick, lead single “California Gurls” is hilarious. As a song, it is actually pretty lame.

On corporate profits:
But we also need to ask a second question now. Where are those profits going? Are they going out the door to shareholders? Or are they going into investment and rising wages? And how do we make sure the recovery actually benefits all workers – not just those at the top? A plain vanilla growth plan is not enough. We need to make sure this time that growth really is growth that is shared. 

So yes, it is everywhere. But I think I liked it better before.

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